Story Almost Done--Mind Blown

I have been asking around for early reviews of my short story Bad for Business.  I'm getting excited that's it's almost done and I can sell it soon.  I've never made money from writing before and I'm really anxious to see what I can get.  Even if I only make a little money from it I would still feel good to know that at least one person out there read it and liked it.

I also know that part of that sort of success is to continue writing, develop a series--that sort of thing.  I'm planning another short story with Adrian Shetler and I have a novel somewhere far off in the works that isn't really even into the planning phase just yet.  I think about how small with project was when I started it and now it has blossomed into something big and beautiful but altogether terrifying,  It blows my mind.

What I started as a whim (hey, I could put together a compilation of detective stories and sell that) has become it's own creation--it has reached 20,000 words!  Hopefully it won't get much longer or it will be officially considered a novella, which I guess would be fine anyway.  But right now it's like a quarter of a short novel or a fifth of long one.  It's crazy cool.

Now Serving: Apple Pie with Vanilla Mortal a la Mode

I had an excellent experience revising and editing yesterday, I added even more new scenes and a new flashback (could be a novella when its done).  I'm wondering if I have too many flashbacks, I feel like they are important to the story but I'm wondering if I could cut a couple that don't seem to have anything to say.  I'll wait until the group sees it to decide, that seems to be a strategy that's working.  I'm hoping I can get a few minutes today to revise and copy edit this manuscript but I'm actually chomping at the bit to work more on my urban fantasy novel (working title is Lost Lamb).

The main character is Jaden, a mercenary who deals with the supernatural on a regular basis and hunts monsters professionally.  I feel like there is a lot of magic and spells that get thrown around in urban fantasy as a matter of course, often our heroes in this genre have some hereditary gift or mystical training that grants them powers.  This is all well and good but it occurred to me recently how tremendously hard it would be to live in a world with monsters and demons as an ordinary human with no special powers or advantages.  When the thought came to me I recalled a mantra from some article or book I'd read about writing fiction that gave a simple formula for compelling writing.

"Believable characters in believable settings with unbelievable difficulty."

What could more difficult than living in a hostile world with no help or protection?  I think that qualifies as unbelievable difficulty.  For that reason I decided to make Jaden a plain ol' vanilla mortal just like ma and pa used to make.  That decision gave me a compass for his personality too, he has to be willing to do underhanded and unfair things to get an advantage.  He uses every tool available to him and is often dishonorable or downright vindictive to the creatures of the night.  I'm interested in that.

Stayed Home Sick

Wooh!  We had writer's night last night and it was great.  Loki couldn't quite present his chapter--he didn't have the chance to get it printed out in time but it was okay.  I presented another installment of Bad for Business that was very well received by everyone.  It's a good feeling to read something that I've worked really hard on and see how readers react.  Everybody stayed late hanging out at the house and talking until midnight, drinking beers and eating snickerdoodles.

I always feel so pumped after group and I can't wait get my fingers on the keyboard and write more.  Next week Loki and my brother should be presenting and I'm looking forward to giving them critique, I'm pretty excited to see what they've been writing.

What most people said about my piece was that they wanted to see more of my plucky mechanic sidekick, so in my revision today I'm adding some more to her conversation with my main character, Adrian.  I keep thinking about how rewarding it is to write revealing dialogue that shows how the characters feel about each other without saying it plainly.  I watched Frozen over the weekend and I actually felt the story could have been told a lot better without the musical numbers, they could have instead been replaced by scenes of revealing dialogue and the story could have been more powerful.

I called in sick from work today, I am feeling pretty crappy but I can't help how good writing makes me feel.  My lungs are burning and my head is throbbing but I have that warm feeling that I get when I write good fiction.

I'm a Bacon Leprechaun

This picture took me probably a half hour to make, I admit I got more caught up in the image than really telling the story.  I live with my girlfriend and her teenage daughter and we share food, because well, that's really the best way to do it I suppose.  The teenager's taste tend to run to richer foods--garlic, creme, butter, cheese, bacon.  She knows how to cook and she's pretty good at it.  For this reason though I never get to eat the bacon that I buy for the house.  So, I've started hoarding it.  I've found the best place to hide the bacon is under vegetables, so the bottom of the crisper drawer is my hidden pot of secret bacon.  After I think I've had my share I put it somewhere in the fridge in plain sight and let it disappear.  Admittedly this strategy is also helping me count calories.

Average Things (not writing about them though)

I had a pretty average day today.  It occurs to me that we never write about average things.  Once upon a time there was chumpy, an average guy who never did anything special at all ever.  The End.  Which is an interesting contrast because most of us believe that we're special for some reason or another, and we wonder--is there really a such thing as average?  I'm not sure I believe in it.  Everyone has their story, how they became who they are today.  Sure they aren't always full of life and death struggles or steamy love affairs (though the latter may be a little more common place).  But I suppose that's why we read.  I know that's why I read.

I'm like Bilbo Baggins, I like my average everyday normal life.  But when I read I want to be Legolas, or James Bond to shift the genre.  When we read we're living vicariously through our protagonists, the people we care about enough to learn how they fictionally lived and died.  They become special to us in a way that non-readers cannot understand.  "The movie was better--had all those computer effects!" They bellow at us until they're blue in face.  "Not the same!" We shout back, feeling like we might as well be speaking German to a tub of jello.  They don't get it.

I used to work in the restaurant for a casino in Smith River (I won't mention the name but I'm sure they wouldn't mind the mention).  I hated it there.  I took a novel with me almost everyday and got in serious trouble for it on a regular basis.  But business was slow out there, I often got done with my work quickly and had nothing else to occupy my idle mind.  A coworker of mine came around the corner once while I was nose deep in The Forge in the Forest and was more than a little confused.  "What are you doing?" He asked me, even though the answer was obvious.  "Reading, what's it look like?" I didn't even take my eyes from the text to look at him.  I could tell by the way he twisted his face and scrunched his mouth that I hadn't really answered his question, "Nobody reads books anymore." It was a statement but it sounded more like a question, he continued, "Everybody watch DVDs." Again it sounded like he was asking to make sure that it was what people were doing and that I was a weirdy.  I knew he couldn't understand and in the end I didn't expect him to.  My book was about me and my enjoyment--it wasn't about what he thought.

The Ethics of Work and You

After I wrote my journal yesterday I did a bit more puttering around than I wanted to, mostly looking up names for characters and map information for the area.  I guess I could write it off as legitimate work but I didn't get as many words written as I wanted.  It looks like I won't be getting as much overtime at work this week so hopefully that will give me a few more hours to do some good writing.  I think what holds me back from working as seriously as I could is that I basically get done with my school job and then come right home to do my unpaid computer job.  I feel like I need a rest in between but if I take one then I won't get hardly any writing done.

Today I'm just going to try to bust out some words and then take a little break with food and video games.  I just have to keep my energy going a little longer, hopefully it'll finally pay off when I get something online.

Itchy Typing Fingers

I haven't worked on any writing since Friday and I'm feeling anxious.  I suppose that's a good feeling to have--to want to work on something.  I suppose it's that and that writer's group didn't happen last week, with the combo I just feel backed up creatively.  It's odd.

Today I'll be putting some more working into my urban fantasy novel, having fun seeing where it's going, and I may edit "Bad For Business" a little.  Not sure if I will do the latter, I almost feel like I should wait until the group sees it before I put any more work into it.  I feel like I'll have to rework it again if I double it up like that.  Though there is twinge of a feeling that maybe the group won't meet again and I would never get this piece down.  I guess I've seen so much failure in my writing that I'm expecting it sometimes.

Either way, no failing today.  Getting back to work from my mini-vacation and that's final.

Recipe: Cinnamon Chip French Toast

This weekend we're in Grants Pass spending some time with my girlfriend's sister and her husband. Yesterday they bought some really nice cinnamon chip sourdough bread, it's from a local bakery. Being that we found it at a discount outlet store it was a little dry and stale--perfect for French toast. I did some research for recipes but ultimately made my own to follow.

1/2 cup whole milk
4 large eggs
3 tablespoons white sugar (or honey)
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 rustic loaf of a sweet sourdough bread (homemade if you have it)

Whisk together all ingredients for custard and park it in your refrigerator for at least an hour (overnight if you have time). Be sure to use a crusty a bread, especially something that's gone stale. The stale bread will take longer to soak but the structures in the bread will act as a sponge for the custard. When your custard mixture has had enough time for the flavors to marry cut off slabs of bread, soak it in the mix and fry it in butter until the edges brown. If you're making a lot set your oven to low and place the cooked pieces on a parchment lined baking sheet to stay warm. Serve with cooked sausages and fried eggs.

Slightly Hung Over at Work, my Students didn't Care

I wait all week for it to be Friday and by the time it's here it's gone all over again.  I'm an Instructional Assistant for a Severely Handicapped class in my local school district.  I never would have thought it was something I would like but it has turned out to be just that.  The teacher was out today and the kids were very wild.  And messy too, we have the custodian on speed dial down there.

I didn't write at all yesterday and now I feel guilty.  The rationale was that I had met my deadline and all I had left to do was present it.  But I couldn't do that because everyone was sick--now I feel like I wasted the day.  That's a feeling I've grown to hate.  My plan is that today I'll work on another piece, I can't do much more to "Bad for Business" until I show it to the group and get some critique.  I feel like I have this sense of urgency to get some work finished and online, not sure why.  Is it because I'm thirty?  Maybe.  I remember making a deal with myself that I wanted to have something published by now--silly, I know.  I guess when I was a kid I always imagined this future where I sold best-selling novels and made a million dollars and married the girl I had a crush on in second grade and bought my own robot dog.  It was supposed to be the future after all.

Now I'm here, it's 2014 and I work part-time and rent a home with my girlfriend and our very not robot dog.  I guess this is better, it's real.  Not a fantasy.  Real things aren't beautiful or perfect but they are ours.  I'm still writing, still doing, still dreaming.

Group got cancelled--I got drunk

Everyone cancelled on group tonight except me and my brother.  I guess they had good reasons, a couple people got sick this week. My girlfriend had presentation night at school--it's like back to school but, uh not that thing.  Still kind of drunk.

My girlfriend's daughter keeps playing this song in her room. It's not loud but it's always the same song, I guess it just makes me feel old, I don't know the name or artist or anything.  I just don't care honestly, not sure why.  Too cynical I guess.

This post is a real downer, I've got to bring it up a notch.  Let me see...kittens.  Feel better?

Meeting Deadlines, Taking Names

Writer's group is tomorrow and I actually have my next installment edited and ready to go.  I'm quite impressed at my own lack of procrastinating.  I decided to add Adrien's hot tech lady sidekick the other day, although for some reason I feel like I tiptoe around female characters.  I want them to be feminine and relatable but I worry they come off as blow up bimbos with huge pillowy breasts and leopard print g-strings.  I found myself trying to describe a hole burnt into Reiko's tank top without mentioning her chest or her midriff.  Part of it too is that if I start describing my women like models in a centerfold then I alienate any female readers who may have an interest in my books.

I'm hoping that by adding more female characters in future stories I can show some contrast, I've been developing the nugget for my next short story and I want it to feature a dangerous woman.  Of course there is a lady in our fiction group so I suppose I could always ask what she thinks about women in my world.

I found myself thinking back to the first chapter I wrote for an urban fantasy novel a couple months ago--it was really strong and fun to write.  Although I hadn't officially chucked the idea I had taken it out of active development.  The reason for that was a lack of content, I wanted that full ninety-thousand word limit of a first novel.  But now that I know there is a decent market for novellas I'm thinking of going back to finish it at whatever length it turns out to be--that excites me.

Dungeons and Dragons is a far out Game

I'm mid-way through editing my manuscript for yet another day and realized that I had forgotten to journal in.  That's what I call it anyway, probably not the right term, but whatever.  The D&D game seemed like a big hit last night, most of my players are taking the game more seriously now.  I do have one player who is getting on my nerves--on his dumb ass phone the whole night.  I'd considered having something bad happen to his character to teach him a lesson but I knew I couldn't break neutrality.  I firmly believe that the mark of an excellent storyteller is one that maintains that neutral position at all costs.  I think Abed says it best in the Dungeons and Dragons episode of community.

Couldn't find the exact clip, you're just going to have to watch it.  Anyway, I feel like I'm stalling on these rewrites--they should be done by now.  I think I do have a plot nugget for a second story with Adrien Shetler the cyberpunk detective--I'd really like to take him to a Mars colony.  I won't give any spoilers but I think it'll be fun to write.

It's Sunday AKA Game Day

Today is the day that I'm going to run AD&D, I always feel a little nervous before running the game.  I'm never quite sure what my players will think of what I've made for them--and more importantly I don't know if they're going to want to do what I have prepared and I don't want to force them.  It's a trade-off I suppose.

I've been watching True Detective lately, kind of surprised at how much I like it.  I figure the premise of the show is a more realistic look at law enforcement and investigation in general.  It's not all chasing bad guys and thwarting evil plots--most of it is talking to people and running down leads.  I think it's giving me a good perspective for my work.

Yesterday I added some editing to my story, it has a working title now--I'm calling it "Bad for Business".  Not sure if I'm going to stick with it but it's better than nothing I guess.  I'm adding a robo savvy plucky female sidekick to the mix and I'm feeling some inner resistance.  I guess I've always thought of the detective as a solitary hero--Batman before Robin showed up.  But he seems too dark, depressing, hopeless.  Not many people want to read that I guess.  I think the addition of this character will ultimately be good for the series, nice to see it all from a new perspective.  I'm still having trouble with a name--thinking something Japanese would be cool for the setting.

Eggs, Bacon, Toast--Coffee!

Just got done with breakfast, not sure how calorie counting is supposed to help me lose weight but it's actually working.  I've lost almost 20 pounds so far.  Don't worry, I'm not going to try to sell you a diet or anything--though we have been talking about putting together a cookbook.  I haven't started writing yet today, I've got a bit of work ahead of me on this 2nd Edition D&D game I'm running tomorrow.  It's been an ongoing campaign--I think everyone is just about level six.  It's tricky finding a good challenge for everyone that isn't going to destroy them and isn't padded with tons of HP.

I've been thinking lately about whether or not I'll add ads to this blog--I'm thinking no though.  Something about it seems artificial, like it isn't a legitimate journal if I'm getting paid for people to read it--what kind of shit is that?  Also there's the angle that it's like, a fraction of a cent or something--bullshit.  Doesn't work for me.

I started some revision to my cyberpunk story the other day, adding a character and making somethings a bit more explanatory.  I guess I hate in fiction when the author has to spell stuff out to you like you're in third grade.  "That's when I realized the killer had been Ms. Merryweather all along." No shit Columbo, I figured that out in chapter 2.  I guess you don't really know what people think of it all until they see it.

Anyway, I'm going to go downstairs and write out this next D&D adventure--that game is a ton of work.  All my players do is sit around and make dick and fart jokes anyway.  That's fine, let me just spend a few hours of my life making an elaborate and detailed world where you can make dick and fart jokes.  That works for you?  Okay, good.

Writer's Group Finally Happening!

Last night our Writer's Critique group met and things went pretty well I thought.  We elected to drink beer instead of tea, which was fine, but it was still the same operation.  Hold up your manuscript in shaking hands, read it out loud to a group of strangers, hope they won't throw squishy tomatoes and bad cabbage at your face.

I put the group together so I figured I would go first--it was terrifying.  I didn't realize how much I lacked in confidence about the whole thing, even though I got pretty good reactions from the whole gang.  I had finished my short story about the cyberpunk detective a few days before, of course I couldn't read the whole thing at once as my girlfriend pointed out, it's forty-five pages long.  So, I broke it up into four part installments, that seemed to go over pretty well.

My friend Loki (not sure if he wants his real name on the internet just yet) agreed to present some fiction for next week, I'm very excited and I can't wait to revise my story a bit more.  I'm wondering if it will get longer and become a novella, that would be cool.

When it's finally done and copy edited my plan is to distribute it as an ebook.  I'm thinking Smashwords is probably the best website for me--there seems to be a lot of good talent there.  I keep thinking about Amazon though, Kindle Direct Publishing is pretty cool and anyone with a Kindle device or app can buy my book--that is cool!  I'm really excited about selling my work and finally letting it see the light of day.